Goodbye, January!

On the last day of every month, I will be writing (in list form) what I have learned. I am really going to be using this year as a "growing year" and am hoping that this monthly flashback will help further my self exploration. I think it's about damn time to make some head way as to finding out who the fuck I am.

In January I have learned...

• To not take things personally

                       Empathy is a quality I possess but, sometimes it can really get the best of me. When a good friend is feeling down, it can put a damper on my day. Or, if a friend is stressed and causes them to be a bit on the snappy side, I will take that in and feel as if I am being attacked, or that it's me. I have to remind myself that when a friend is having a rough time, it has nothing to do with me (hopefully) and that although I am willing to help with anything I can, it is not my problem. 





                                         And that coincides with....

• "Retail Therapy" is not an excuse to work out frustrations with spending copious (to me) amounts of money 

                      Now that I am a "non-smoker", I'm going to have to find other means to  work shit out.            
                                        Here's an idea....

• Every month: start and finish a project!

                       Pretty explanatory

• When things don't work out RIGHT NOW, it is not the end of the world.

• I am allowed to keep to my own schedule.

• Everyone is human, and makes mistakes; even if they are your parents.

I would say I learned a lot this month. Had a few peaceful epiphanies and a break down but hey! I'm still alive! Must be doing something right!


<3alex

Isn't it Ironic? (I'm referencing that song.)

It's AH-MAY-ZING how things can turn around on you. You could be having a bad day (me), worrying about money (me, again), wondering if you should really be making plans for a post grad spring break trip (Yep...) and you get.......

A PROMOTION?!

Ok, ok. Is it technically a promotion? No. But, I had done the training today and it seems so far like a step up from what I was previously hired on for. It isn't more pay but it IS more hours so....it is more pay.... essentially.

So, it's two days after my microdermabrasian and overall face skin torture appointment and the dryness, redness and soreness has subsided to a degree. I THOUGHT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME BOOTIFOOL. In the long run, it will be worth it but for years I have treated my face like shit (all in good intentions) with all the promising acne clearing cleanses, cream, tonics, whatever and this is pretty much my last resort: crystals shooting my face, vacuuming and the usage of various instruments to dig things out of my face.

I seem real attractive right now, I know. Marry me.

<3 alex

Dreams are dreams until you make them a reality.

Had a dream that I was on my way to new york with my guy friend that I'll be living with and while stopped at a gas station to fill up the amtrak station, I decided to pop in and check out what was in said gas station - look for sunglasses or something, and my friend and the amtrak left without me. I know what this dream means, it makes perfect sense to me...

***After re-reading this entry once arriving home from work, I felt like it was plagued with negative rambling. Although I am allowed to have sad, angry, worrisome thoughts about  not getting enough support or the overwhelming feeling of needing to prove something to my family, or the utter fear that this journey is impossible to begin- this nightmare has a positive opportunity hiding within it. Yes, it was a bad dream but I shouldn't dwell on the poor feelings I have surrounding my moving out and on in the real world that made this dream happen. This dream should be a motivator. "I know that won't happen to me because 1. I am motivated enough. 2. It's my choice. 3. No one can stop me but myself and 4. Amtrak doesn't use gas stations.


It is my life and I choose to live it.


End of story.

<3alex

Work Outfit ein

And some more new webcam fun...

It snowed!


Honestly, I love credit cards until you have to pay them off. Today I obviously bought a new webcam that I ADORE.

But, with buying an HD Webcam and having a Blogspot account, I assume I may sometimes need to put on makeup.

alex

Morning Face One

2012 Promises and Expectations

                          HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Kay. I'm way late in the real world but, in the 'New Post' Blog world, it's a new year when I say it is.

Instead of making New Years resolutions this year, I decided to call them New Years Promises and Expectations because, the very word resolution sounds more like an obligation than the words I have replaced it with... except maybe promises but it can go either way...


Anyway! I have been quite successful in keeping my  new year's promises!

1. I've quit smoking cigarettes
Rather, I have still technically been smoking but it's MUCH better than those nasty smelling, rat poison sticks. The South Beach Smoke electronic cigarettes have been a step up, and a great tool for gradually becoming smoke free period!

2.Being happy everyday and making each day an opportunity for positive thinking

3. Moving to New York City
I have been checking off my list of to do's in order to move up there and I'm doing it quickly.

4. Learning about myself and finding self love 

5. Got my first (of many soon to come) tattoo!

And lastly...

5. Taking this blog more seriously!!
Whenever I moved, either from Arizona to Texas, high school to college or Texas to Pennsylvania, I loved reading old diaries about the life and memories I had made there. And now, being in the technical world where you're life can be backed up, I've decided to make this my official (and public) diary. Blogs can be fun, and I read a number of them a day that I look forward to their updates. I love reading about different peoples' lives (that didn't sound creepy...but, why else do we keep coming back to certain peoples' blogs?!) and happening upon new ideas and making discoveries. I want to record mine now....on the internet.


I have a lot of ideas that will be made into existence this year and I am oh so excited! Even if this blog is never read by another soul, this is still another thing to check off of my Promises and Expectations of 2012.


Alex